6 Things You Can Do To Attract Positivity into Your Life: Part 3 of 3

You know when someone feeds off of negativity because they are the ones that always seem to have something going wrong in their lives. They aren't any different than you or me; they just focus and dwell on the negative, so they get more of it. If you have heard yourself say these things: "It's always something." "It never ends." "The hits just keep on coming." "Why do these [negative] things always happen to me?" chances are you are the cause of all the negativity. Yes you! Take responsibility instead of playing the victim. You'll notice your life starting to look very differently from where you sit. Then back track and start this mini-series over.

I wanted to throw the above paragraph in because I think it's super important for us to be aware and take responsibility in life for any of this mini-series to work at all.

All of that being said...Yay! How to attract positivity into your life part 3 of 3 is here. If you missed Part 1 and Part 2, be sure to check those out before continuing on.

Now then, let’s get to it.

5. Believe that you deserve whatever you want.

Sometimes it’s easy to get down on yourself and stay in the rut of feeling like you just don’t deserve what you want. Maybe you think you don’t work hard enough, look good enough, aren’t smart enough, you name it. Insecurities and negativity spoken over our lives can really put a damper on our belief of deserving what we want.

My idea on this process might seem a little backwards but give this a try. I’ll use myself as an example. Say you (like me) want to make a positive impact on other people’s lives through motivational and encouraging words and showing lots of love to your fellow man. Perhaps you haven’t had any special training, no schooling, and it’s not like you’re a doctor with a clinical psychology private practice so you may ask yourself what is your expertise. Maybe you’ve never even really talked that much and when you do others appear as though they don’t give a rip.

You are set up to feel like you couldn’t possibly have anything to offer that people would want. Why bother? Well…I’m here to tell you that you can throw that thought right out the window! If you have something YOU want to do, there is no desire police that will stop you (barring illegal desires) from doing it. J You are the one holding the reigns to your own life, directing the horse in the direction you want it to go.

When you give yourself the liberty to believe that you have the right to go after what you want, regardless of experience, education, history, etc. you open yourself up to a whole new world of possibility. Not only will you feel empowered but you will feel inspired to do what is necessary to reach your goals.

Perhaps you do need to have that educational degree to practice in a clinical setting. If this is the case, you must understand this: When you believe that you deserve anything you desire, it is that preemptive nudge that gets you on the path to earning whatever it is you must earn, acquiring whatever you must acquire, or learning whatever you must learn in order to get wherever it is you want to go and be whoever it is you want to be.

Wow. What a doozie and a total mouthful, but it is a place to start. The rest will follow suit of that foundation and fall right into place.

6. Have a plan and work the plan

Remember that previous step; believe that you deserve whatever you want. You must do that before you make a plan and work it. Essentially this is because if you don’t believe, you won’t put forth the effort to plan and work towards your goals. You don’t want to be stuck on the wrong side of that dividing line.

So now that we believe that we deserve what we want, we go for it baby! We dream, believe, make plans, follow through with those plans and reach our goals. We truly will get whatever we want and attract all sorts of positive things into our lives.

It’s that simple and that hard. The simple part is knowing what we have to do, the hard part is actually doing it. That’s always the hard part. But a tire doesn’t get changed without a little elbow grease. Same as your life doesn’t end up where you want it unless you stir the wheel and shift the gears. Some of us live on autopilot; that is the dreadful side of the dividing line you don’t want to be on.

Tools. You need tools to iron out your dreams. I love to use Microsoft Word as a tool to make plans. I have tons of ideas written down (shoot I should make a backup copy again). I have projects that I want to accomplish outlined and anytime I have an event that I'm in charge of I make a plan that includes, ideas, needs, times, dates, etc. I get my mind organized on paper. Maybe that could help you too.

Also, I use a vision board. I have it hung in a place where I can see it every day. I include inspirational quotes, pictures of places I want to go, and words of encouragement. It is a reminder that I can have and do anything I want. It is a place where positivity is written over me and when I read it, it is spoken over my life. I am, in essence, convincing myself that I will accomplish my goals. We all know that once your mind is made up, little can stop you.

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We can all attract positive things and who doesn’t want more positive things in their life? It’s not that difficult when your mind is in the right place. There is untold power in your mind. Put it to good use and get all the great things that your pretty little heart desires! Sometimes life throws us a few curveballs and of course we have to deal with those surprises appropriately. However, attracting positivity into your life can be consistent.

Enjoy Life,

In the words of a mother

6 Things You Can Do To Attract Positivity into Your Life: Part 2 of 3

Remember last week’s 2 things you can do to attract positive things into your life? Here’s a refresher if you have forgotten.

1.    Wake up and recite 10 things you are grateful for.

2.    Speak out loud everyday what you want. Pause and pretend you already have it.

Moving on to numbers 3 and 4 on the list, here we go!

3. Use good manners

Simple enough. Just be nice to people. You don’t need to kiss a$$. That would prove to work just the opposite, but that’s another post. You just need to be polite and considerate.  Say please and thank you to absolutely ANYBODY that does ANYTHING for you. This includes your waiter, your child, your spouse, the janitor, your employee, your boss, your friend, the neighbor…ANYBODY! This will put others in a more positive mood around you which will then boost your positive energy and the gift just keeps on giving.

If you can, be the mood setter of every situation you find yourself in. You want to be able to bring others up to where you are instead of them dragging you down. Sincere politeness is one of the tools that can help you achieve this. It manifests positive energy. Positive energy is like food. It can sustain you and just like food when it’s prepared properly; it can be an enjoyable experience rather than simply calories to keep you moving. That’s boring. Energy in general will keep you moving but positive energy will have you happily soaring!

Also, gentlemen, please don’t forsake chivalry. I used to fight this because of my own silly insecurities, but now I’m in love with that elderly man that held the door open for me and my mother at the restaurant the other day. So go ahead and open that department store door for the ladies and wait for them to walk through. Put the lady’s coat on for her. Allow her to order first. Some women may be ungrateful but the majority who appreciate good old-fashioned courtesy will be obliged. Besides, it makes us feminine women feel secure. J (Shout out to my best cuz Kris who I argued with about this back in the day. You were right, I was wrong. You're smart, I'm stupid. You're pretty, I'm ugly.)

4. Be generous

“You get what you give.” “What goes around comes around.” “Karma’s a b*^&#.” “You reap what you sew.” You’ve all heard of these sayings. Obviously it’s a fundamental truth. It’s like the golden rule; treat others as you want to be treated. It is a universal law that absolutely no one can escape from.

This is why generosity is one of the greatest traits you can possess to attract positivity into your life. Of course you don’t want to give just to receive, in fact, that sort of defeats the purpose. True generosity has a heart condition that simply wants to bless, help, and make others happy. When you are truly generous, you can NOT and will NOT ever outrun the treasures that will be given to you.

Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to seek out your own motives for being generous. Are you generous because you want recognition and glory? Do you give so that others think you are rich and/or nice? Do you try and buy another’s love, approval, or affection? Do you give to others just to get something in return? If you answered yes to any of these questions – OOPS! - you unfortunately won’t be reaping too many positive things out of those motives. That’s okay, change it. Start giving just because people need what you have to give.

Side note: What you give doesn’t have to be monetary or wrapped or material. Some of us are more suited to give a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, advice to lend, or words of encouragement. Give what you know how to give and steadily work on expanding your generosity.

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Everyone can use good manners and being generous is a trait that we all can work on. This week focus on using good manners with the people closest to you. Sometimes we are more polite to strangers than we are our own family. Also, try doing two generous things this week that you wouldn’t normally do. Perhaps pay for the people behind you in the drive-thru or stop and help the person broke down on the side of the road.

Thanks for reading! See y’all next week for part 3!

Graciously yours,

In the words of a mother

6 Things You Can Do To Attract Positivity into Your Life: Part 1 of 3

photo courtesy of google pics

We could all use some extra positivity in our lives. I know I could. This list of six things to do is a great way to start attracting everything you want like a magnet. I'm breaking down the six things to do to attract more positivity into your life into three posts. I don't want you to get overwhelmed and I think it's important to practice a couple of things at a time for a few days before incorporating more. 

Without further ado...

1. Wake up and recite 10 things you are grateful for.

A lot of times we merely forget to be grateful. The hustle and bustle of life gets us caught up in everything that needs to be done or what we want to get done; we simply go through the motions taking for granted everything that enables us to do those things.

Starting off every morning with a grateful attitude is a surefire way to have a great day. It will open doors for you that otherwise would remain on lock. When you walk around with a piss poor attitude, complaining about what you wish you had but don’t, how horrible your boss is, how bratty your kids are, how inconsiderate your husband is, how crappy the weather is, what a POS car you have, how high the gas prices are, what little money you have, etc. you feel defeated so that’s exactly what you will be. 

Flip that daggum Debbie downer attitude right on its head! Do a complete 180 and start exclusively saying what you are grateful for. Sound hard? It’s actually not that hard IF you start your day off with a positive, grateful attitude. The positivity will flow much more naturally.

We can be grateful about the smallest things to even the greatest things. When’s the last time you stopped and thanked God for being able to walk or breathe without difficulty. Maybe you can’t walk or breathe without difficulty but you can talk, smile and enjoy a hot cup of coffee in the wee hours of the morning. You can read a good book or catch a great flick. Whatever it is that you enjoy or are blessed with, you can choose to be grateful and it helps to say it out loud. You can even write it down.

2. Speak out loud everyday what you want. Pause and pretend you already have it.
Okay, so if someone walks in on you and you’re talking to yourself there may be a small, awkward moment there but hey, we all talk to ourselves sometimes. Right? RIGHT?? Is anyone listening? Crap. Is this one of those moments? J But no, seriously, there is POWER in the tongue. Someone much wiser than me once said, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” Yep, that’s a scripture out of Proverbs. That book is full of goodies!

It’s so true though. You can speak death and life with the power of your words. You can speak death or life over your finances, your marriage, your children’s attitudes and so on. You can literally even speak death over someone physically. How many people do you know or have you heard of that committed suicide because they were ridiculed for being gay, fat, ugly, different, or whatever it is that people choose to be cruel about. Ridiculing people is a form of speaking death over them? Even if it’s only speaking death over their self-esteem, it’s still death. Ick! Stop that! 

Alright, let me get back to the topic at hand. After you recite your daily gratitude, say out loud what you want. You can even call up a friend and discuss the things you want in life. Don’t bother talking about what you don’t want because then you’d be focusing on that and getting more of it. Say: I want to be financially secure. Pause, pretend you are, and let the feeling of being financially secure set it. Feel the security, comfort, whatever it is that feels positive. Then move on and say the next thing. I want a happy, connected relationship with my partner…yada yada. Do this for as many things as you want and for as long as you want or have time for.

Pay attention to what you feel down deep when you say what you want. It is important because these feelings will reveal the real you. When you say, I want a brand new, big house, how do you feel when you say it? Do you feel blessed, fortunate, comfortable, and lavish? Or do you feel greedy, materialistic, selfish, and petty? If you feel the first feelings, you are in sync with what you value and that is totally fine. If you feel the second list of feelings, it's time to ask yourself why you feel that way. Perhaps you don't really value a big, fancy house but you have let society pressure you into thinking you need that to be successful.

Whatever it might be, you will get whatever you want so long as your desires line up with what you truly value in your core. When your fantasies line up with your values, it gives you the ultimate “good feeling”. You'll know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are on the right path.

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Put these two tips into practice for a few days and notice the difference in your attitude. Stay tuned for the next two steps coming at you in about a week!

Get what you want,

In the words of a mother

Past, Present, Future - Part 3 of 3

 

 

Hope for the Future

Part 3

photo courtesy of google images

"Planning is bringing the future into the present so that you can do something about it now.” ~Alan Lakein. This quote pretty darn near nails it. The future is important but not as much as what you are doing in the present. In fact, you can’t have a future without the present. And you certainly can’t have the future you want without working towards it now.

It’s totally fine to dream, plan, and hope for a brighter future. In fact, it’s healthy! It doesn’t mean that you’re not living in “the now”. Shoot, we all want good health, wealth, and happiness and who couldn’t use more of that, ya know. I have just started using more visualization techniques, picturing myself being at my book signing with a line out the door and touching thousands of people’s lives with what the good Lord has blessed me with. I love to use techniques now to boost my outcome for the future.

Now that being said…“Happy people plan actions, they don’t plan results.” ~Dennis Wholey. Okay, so we definitely need to plan for the future by doing things now. Ahhh, you can’t escape that fact. If you ever want to reach your highest potential, not a damn thing will happen until you are actually reaching for the stars, not just gazing at them from afar, admiring their beauty. For instance, I can dream all day long about writing a book that becomes a bestseller but it’ll never happen if I don’t WRITE it! Plan the actions, DO the actions, and sit back and enjoy the results.

We are responsible for everything we get and don’t get in our lives. Sure, life can throw some curveballs and a few surprises here and there but we are responsible for how we handle it. We can either rise above or play the victim.

“Good fortune is what happens when opportunity meets with planning.” ~Thomas Alva Edison. Well I’ll be darn. The good ones just keep on rolling. This post is quote city but I tell you what, they are remembered and mentioned for a reason. Chalk full of wisdom, we can live off this stuff! If you want good health, wealth, and happiness (which is my definition of good fortune) then you must plan for it and you absolutely, 100% WILL meet it!

I truly believe that the whole universe (cliché but oh well) is on your side! Similar to the following quote, “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ~Jeremiah 29:11. You have nothing to fear except giving up. So simply don’t!

All of that being said, let’s do what you all know I love to do; ask questions and really think about the answers. Really get down to the nitty gritty. What do you want to be in the future? How do you see yourself as an elderly person? Who would you like around you as you age? What do you see yourself having to offer in the future?

What do you want to be in the future?

I want to be a promoter of people. A lover of my fellow brothers and sisters. A loving, compassionate, powerful, inspiring, voice in the world. I want to make a difference in the lives of many. I want to be a successful writer and yes, make a great living at it but more so, affect the outcomes of people's lives. I want to be such a great writer that my words light the fire in the spirits of others and compel them to reach their potential. I want to reach my potential. I want to be a great wife, mother, sister, daughter, aunt, cousin, friend, acquaintance, gardener, etc. Doggonit I want to be an amazing me! J

How do you see yourself as an elderly person?

I see myself as the happiest old lady anyone has ever seen. I see myself with a smile always on my face, laughing, and telling silly jokes. I see myself as completely in acceptance with myself and others. I see silver hair and a serene core. I see myself as accomplished and fulfilled, alert and active, kind and full of endless love. Dang, I like that old lady!

Who would you like around you as you age?

Needless to say, I would love my beautiful little petunia, Cheyann around. My darling daughter who will always be just as perfect as the day she was born. I certainly want my husband, Sean and my family around. I want to spend plenty of time with my friends and of course my bestie, Steph (School of Rock-n-Raw, check her out. She's AHHH-mazing). And last but not least, I want all the people that have crossed my path and those whose paths I’ve crossed in a profound way to be near and dear to my heart.

What do you see yourself having to offer in the future?

I think this might be one of the most important questions on the subject. Life is about what you give more than what you get. I want to offer a vast legacy. I want to leave an imprint in the spirits and on the hearts of others. I want to offer so much love to others that they can’t contain it, which forces them to share it and spread it like a wild fire! I want to offer an ear in the world that listens, a mouth that only speaks positively, a touch that soothes, an eye that notices, a taste that appreciates, and a sniff that stops to smell the roses. I want to offer all the great things that God has blessed me with and called me to share. Again, I want to offer love. That’s what it all boils down to.

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Remember, you can and you will have darn near anything and everything you want in the future. Apply yourself now to get what you want later. Don’t worry about the future, simply plan for it. I am 100% rooting for you to reach your potential and beyond. The future will be great fun. See ya there.

You WILL have the future you want,

In the words of a mother